“Procrastination is like a credit card: it's a lot of fun until you get the bill."
- Christopher Parker 

How many times have we said to ourselves,  – “I just can’t seem to take that first step.”  Or, “It’s so hard to get started.” ?  What is it about a beginning,  especially if we perceive the task in front of us to be really difficult, or boring or not what we want to be doing?  The result is that we get immobilized,  frozen in place, put on our procrastination coat and don’t move.  We get distracted so easily – how fun it is to be on Facebook and check out what your friends are doing on their vacations, see what is happening in Washington, listen to the latest Entertainment News, watch the View, The Chew, look up a recipe,  talk to your co-workers, clean out your desk drawer, and so on?

Before we know it, we’re wondering, gosh, what happened to the day and the List of Things I needed to do?!  We are frustrated, stressed and end up beating ourselves up for not getting things done.  Fun is over, bill is due. Not a great place to be.

Dr. Wayne Dyer, one of the most incredibly motivating people in the world, talks about how to “Live From the End” in his book “Wishes Fulfilled. Mastering the Art of Manifesting.”  He sees, hears and feels that what he wants to accomplish as already done.  Not in process, or just in the planning stages, but already done! 

The Hopscotch Connection

So this got me thinking about how we even get started and get past being get stuck at the beginning.  Remember when you were little and you played hopscotch?  You didn’t jump on the first block – you went at least to the second one - and had some fun jumping over the beginning.

Instead of being frozen in place, take the second step first:  ask yourself, “What is the second thing you need to do?”  How does that feel to you?  Act like the first step has already been done and you are suddenly in ‘action’, already on phase two.  It has a whole different feeling,  right?  Now when you jump over the first step, you move along more smoothly,  and then you can either go back and quickly do that first thing or skip it all together - be it starting to write your book (hey, you are already on page 2!),  coming up with new ways of making more money (ahh- two ideas now),  getting out of a bad relationship (the hard part is already behind you).  See what I mean?  Move along the path, and you are well on your way to realizing your dreams, feeling better, or just plain getting things done.

This way you get to enjoy what you are doing, AND you get out of ‘stuck.’  Action brings joy, success and just such a feeling of - wow - I did it!  So go ahead – set your sights, throw out your goal, jump past the first block on your internal hopscotch course, and soon you can reach out and grab that goal you almost stopped yourself from getting.  Skipping ahead isn’t really so hard after all! 

Many of us have had, or have known, children graduating from college.  There was so much joy through all those years of seeing our children grow up, and now we suddenly watch them step into their own new post-college worlds. It is amazing to see the transformation they have all gone through and to think about the new life they have in front of them!  

Coincidentally (or perhaps not), I came across a video from Marie Forleo about Feeling Lost that really got my attention. “Lost” was, in a way, how I was feeling about graduation.  Throughout the happiness, there was also something going on that was so unexpected – I was off balance, knowing that we are entering into another transition, another new world.

It is so hard letting our children go.  Not that we ever fully do “let them go,” but the pomp and circumstance of the commencement” ceremony really brings home that this is a significant, life-changing event.

Now I am faced with how to enjoy this next phase of our family’s journey.  I imagine there are many of you in this same situation – be it high school or college graduation, becoming grandmothers, suddenly becoming caretakers,  taking early retirement, or some other life-changing event -- it seems that so many of us are in a great upheaval and transition.

So I am looking back to what helped me through my past great challenges in life, and I offer you some of the most important lessons that I learned on not only how to cope, but to also grow and understand that life’s changes can also bring much joy:

1. Understand and accept that you cannot control every outcome.  About 18 months ago, while going through a personal crisis, David Ji (then with the Chopra Center advised me to focus on what I could control.  What a relief to know I wasn’t in control of everything and could just let some things go!

2. Accept help from others.  There are real life “angels” all around, ready to give you just what you need at the moment. Get outside of your feelings and be open to help, which is in front of you. As my cousin always says, “Accept graciously.”

3. Be grateful. Accept and know inside that the change you are going through is all for a reason, and there are transformative life lessons to be learned. Also consider that your challenges and transitions are not only about what is happening to you but that, somehow, others would benefit from your experience as well. 

4. Be Curious. Ask yourself “I wonder what will happen if…?”

Be childlike in your curiosity; it will move you to places of joy if you allow it.

When you feel lost in these times of transition and upheaval, remember these 4 lessons,  and you will already be well on your way to being found.   

I started The International Center for Women on Purpose because I know firsthand how challenging these times of significant transition can be… AND I know they can be just as exciting and even FUN.  I wanted to give you a chance to get to the “exciting and fun” part, so I started a business to help you do just that!  You see, this business is a result of my own journey of change, so we probably understand a lot about each other already!

I have had a long and wonderfully successful career as an HR executive, and then as an HR consultant (nationally and internationally), but I needed something different in order to add to what my career has been so far.   I’m an inventor at heart, so I knew there had to be a way to use my skills and experience in a new way that could both feel exciting to me again and be inspiring to others.  I also love international travel and the unique perspectives it provides, so the “international” part of the business was really important to me.

After a few false starts (as I said, change is an adventure!), and a grueling hiatus while dealing with my husband’s serious health issues, I used the help of wise coaches and a vibrant support network to bring The International Center for Women on Purpose alive!

I first thought that to do something more satisfying and fun with my life, I needed to start a new life recipe “from scratch” – starting all over.    What I’ve learned instead (thank goodness!) is that everything I’ve done in the past I get to bring together for what I’m doing now!   The same goes for you – each part of your past is a strong stepping stone to where you are now and where you will go in the future.  

Our most important and impactful work often comes from our own life experience and the learning we get from solving our own challenges, doesn’t it?  It worked out perfectly that the things I needed in order to create this business are the same things that can help you make your own transitions.

I discovered that I needed all of the following in my transition to a new career (and life!):

• A guide
• A process (some kind of format to follow)
• A variety of POWERFUL products and services to help me achieve my goals
• Re-inforcement that I was (and am) going in the right direction… and suggestion for correction if going off course!
• Celebration
• Pampering / self-care / play
• A network of others

It’s no coincidence that those are the tools and resources available to you through Women on Purpose; I figured if I needed these things, you probably do too!  (See more details on the Discovery Programs page).

Change, even change you are looking forward to, can be difficult, but it can also be exciting and even FUN!  My hope is that here you can find what you need in order to believe for yourself and prove to others that times of transition can be our times of greatest creativity and possibility!

What change are you going through, or considering going through?

Are you feeling the same way as I did about needing to re-energize your life?

And how can we (myself, the Women on Purpose team, and other readers) help support you?  (Feel free to comment.)